Thursday, December 24, 2009


Mom is here visiting, the apartment is clean, and my Christmas Tree is shining...

Monday, November 23, 2009

I have a confession...

EVERY SINGLE MIZZOU GAME I WATCHED ON TV OR IN COLUMBIA, THE TIGERS LOST. Every single game that I missed MIZZOU won. I'm afraid that I'm bad luck for the University of Missouri...


Tif & I are heading to The Ranch for Thanksgiving

Last Saturday Mom visited a Methodist Church in a bad neighborhood of Kileen and in the 1st 15 minutes she was in the Church someone busted out her window and stole her purse. They didn't get her home keys or cell phone, but they did get her cash, credit cards, work keys, etc. She has already cancelled everything. I don't like her living out in the country by herself. Tif & I are leaving early Wednesday morning. Tif's Mom is sending some Pumpkin Bread with us and Tif is making some Gooey Butter Cake. We may go to the Dallas Zoo or Botanical Garden while we are there. I really miss my friends at the Bookstore.


Wednesday, November 11, 2009

I miss my buddy

Paul, if you are still reading my Journal please give me a call I need to talk with you...

Ft. Hood Memorial Ceremony

My Mom attended the Memorial Service at Ft. Hood yesterday to honor the victims of the shooting. She left at 9:30am and got back to the ranch at 4:30. Most of that time was getting onto and off of the post. Security was high because of our President attending. Mom just told me that the lady that sang AMAZING GRACE at the Ceremony was the same lady that sang at my Father's funeral. I watched the highlights on the news but I didn't see Mom...


from the movie LOVE ACTUALLY...

Prime Minister: "Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009



If I can maintain my weight at 250 lbs I might get a tattoo on my left shoulder. Tiffany does not like my choice of design...
This is what it will look like:



(but you already knew that)

Friday, October 23, 2009

Today is Friday!

Never explain. Your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe it anyway.

David<~~~~~~~grateful for my friends!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


I don't know which is sadder: Watching these people try and relive the heydays of their youth, or ME for wishing I could go...

David<~~~~~STILL a poseur!

Monday, October 12, 2009

I slept well last night!

I actually slept all the way to dawn! That was nice, I'm fed up with not being able to sleep. I'm trying to keep myself awake till later so I can move my sleep schedule. Typically I fall asleep 8:30 or 9pm. Wake up around Midnight and end up laying there thinking till I get up and distract myself with the TV or the Internet. It's hard to function with 4 hours of sleep a night...

Monday, October 5, 2009


“Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon”

~Winnie the Pooh

Sunday, October 4, 2009



I woke up early. I am very tired. Tiffany is at Church. I miss my Dad. The TV is on. Snooky is snoring loudly. I can't focus right. I miss my Dad.

Friday, October 2, 2009

I am tired...

sing a song

swallow a hand of six pills
diabetic til I die
we all fall down...


David<~~~one tired dude!

I got some sleep last night

It seems I have two speeds when it comes to sleeping: 1) Sleep for a short time OR 2) Sleep for an hour wake up sleep for an hour wake up (repeat). It is running me down. I can't concentrate and I'm forgetting things. Ahhhh..."The Life Of Riley"

Actually I used to live the life of Riley. Ft. Riley that is. Its an old cavalry post between Junction City KS and Manhattan KS (I should say between JCKS and OGDEN KS, but I don't want to give the officials who set up the speed traps in Ogden any love). Ft. Riley was my favorite Army Post we lived in while my Dad was in the Military. We had a stone duplex that was the biggest house I had ever lived in. It used to not be divided and was the quarters for a Captain. YIKES! There were 4 floors. Basement mostly unfinished with a bedroom, bathroom, utility room, and another room (that we had a pool table in). First floor held the sitting room, formal dining room, butler's pantry, kitchen, formal stairway, and back stairs. Second floor had the study, master bedroom, bathroom, living room. Third floor was the domain of my brother and I with the attic storage, bathroom, and two bedrooms. The front of the house was covered with ivy and we had a garage across the street for the vehicles. Our house was by itself on a triangular piece of land between the two major sections of Officer's Quarters on Ft. Riley. I remember when some workmen arrived to remove the ivy from the front of our house and Mom called Dad and then the workmen left without the ivy. One of the benefits of being an Officer's Wife. I don't have a picture of our house with me here in STL (Mom will have one at the Ranch, I'll get it when I visit). I found this picture on the Internet and these are Officer's Quarters...

on the way to this statue.

These two pictures were taken to the right of our house. It was a good place to live.

David<~~~~~~~~lucky guy!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Weary Willie at the Hartford Circus Fire

David<~~loves Circus history (the good & the bad)

Wednesday, September 30, 2009


Sleep my friend

Sleep is poor

Sleep is penned

my life a bore

Sleep my friend

Sleep the chore

Sleep will end

i'll dream no more

Sleep my friend

Sleep the boar

Sleep will rend

with tusks that gore

Sleep my friend

Sleep the door

Sleep will send

me to life before

Sleep my friend

Sleep not war

Sleep will mend

my heart will soar


David<~~~~~~woke up at 11:30pm last night


Monday, September 28, 2009

Tiffany at the Sheryl Crow/Elvis Costello Concert underneath the STL Arch!

(my beautiful girlfriend Tiffany, love you girl!)

Snooky goes swimming...

OK, to clarify, 'swimming' refers to Snooky's love of stretching out on her belly & back and crawl thru the grass. It looks like she's swimming... I tried to take a video on my phone of Snooky doing this this morning during our walk but every time the video camera started up it makes weird noise and Snooky would run away from the camera and hide behind me. So all the videos are of empty grass or my shadow. ::shakes head::

David<~~~~~~~~Dog Owner!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Losing weight...

Last Tuesday I weighed in at 278 yesterday I tipped the scales at 265, I suspect all the walking in Chicago was the biggest factor, that and I'm not finishing anything that I eat lately. Less intake, more exercise = skinnier David!

(in HS I weighed 180 lbs)

David<~~~~~~First weight goal has always been to stablize my weight at 250 (then to shoot for 200!)

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Thursday, September 17, 2009


all night long

i lie awake

remembering all

the mistakes i make

my thoughts are mine

and mine alone

i see the outlines

cast by my phone

i wait for the time

to get out of bed

to stop the thoughts

trapped in my head

round and round

i beat the horse

it's nobody's fault

but mine of course

another hour

has come and gone

an hour closer

to the coming dawn

time to get up

and start the day

one hour closer

till i enter the fray

the nightly battle

with me myself

i can't set my troubles

away on a shelf

i obsess and fuss

i bother with them all

no rest for the wicked

till time for the call

the alarm i've set

on my cell phone

i lie awake

and pick at the bone

worrying about

the things i've done

and worrying about

my tasks undone

i'd love to sleep

and lie in bed

but the thoughts won't quit

running round my head

i have to let go

i have to forgive

myself for mistakes

and try to live

the life i have left

and the people i love

and fall asleep

like hand in glove

i doze a bit

my eyes droop shut

i'm almost asleep

except for the but

but for this here

or an imagined mistake

but for that thought there

no more can i take

i want to sleep

to just drift away

but that's not my fate

not along this way

so all night long

i lie awake

remembering all

the mistakes i make...

David<~~~~~~wakes up EVERY morning at 3:30am!

My Suprise Birthday Trip!

My wonderful girlfriend Tiffany has planned a Surprise Birthday Trip for me this weekend (my Birthday is tomorrow and it's not too late to get me something: 3XLT favorite color is black). This morning she dropped off a Pre-Trip Information letter with a list of 'What to pack". How fun! I have some errands to run and some packing to do...

David<~never been surprised before IN MY LIFE!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Insomnia is not my friend

We have switched to an earlier shift at work and I worry too much about things so if you add that up you get David not sleeping well. 4 hours of sleep at night just doesn't cut it...


Saturday, August 29, 2009

NEW Conner pic!

he looks great, & he's getting so big!
David<~~~~~~~~~~~~~PROUD UNCLE!

Thursday, August 27, 2009



(by Matisyahu)

sometimes I lay

under the moon

and thank God I'm breathing

then I pray

don't take me soon

cause i'm here for a reason

sometimes in my tears I drown

but I never let it get me down

so when negativity surrounds

I know some day it'll all turn around


all my live I've been waiting for

I've been praying for

for the people to say

that we dont wanna fight no more

they'll be no more wars

and our children will play

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day

it's not about

win or lose

because we all lose

when they feed on the souls of the innocent

blood drenched pavement

keep on moving though the waters stay raging

in this maze you can lose your way (your way)

it might drive you crazy but dont let it faze you no way (no way)

sometimes in my tears I drown

but I never let it get me down

so my negativity surrounds

I know some day it'll all turn around


all my live I've been waiting for

I've been praying for

for the people to say

that we dont wanna fight no more

they'll be no more wars

and our children will play

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day this all will change

treat people the same

stop with the violence

down with the hate

one day we'll all be free

and proud to be

under the same sun

singing songs of freedom like

one day

one day

one day

one day

all my live I've been waiting for

I've been praying for

for the people to say

that we don't wanna fight no more

they'll be no more wars

and our children will play

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day

one day


David<~~~~rocking out to the Reggae music sung by a hasidic Jew

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

::stares at myself in the mirror::


Tuesday, August 25, 2009


Music has a profound effect on me. After listening to The Arcade Fire I put some Erin Bode on to soothe the savage breast and get myself in the proper frame of mind to put on my 'Retail Hat' and run my Store this morning. I wake up WAY to early and then have lots of time to think. I think about things I have done wrong, and I think of things I have done right. I am to hard on myself and I don't let things go like I should. Obsess would be an understatement. This is the song I am listening to...

(I'd love to have Erin back at my Store to perform again)

David<~~~~~~~time to knock the mud off and get ready for work!

cold cold wind

if your fire goes out

if your heart quits shining

will the cold wind blow you away?

if the tears rain down

if the sadness washes you away

will the cold cold wind blow your way?

will the cold wind blow





This is a wonderful video that made me sad to listen to it, I don't know why. I miss my buddy Paul. And I really need to...


Somethin' filled up
my heart with nothin',
someone told me not to cry.
But now that I'm older,
my heart's colder,
and I can see that it's a lie.
Children wake up,
hold your mistake up,
before they turn the summer into dust.
If the children don't grow up,
our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up.
We're just a million little gods causin' rain storms turnin' every good thing to rust.
I guess we'll just have to adjust.
With my lightnin' bolts a glowin'
I can see where I am goin' to be
when the reaper he reaches and touches my hand.
With my lightnin' bolts a glowin'
I can see where I am goin’
With my lightnin' bolts a glowin'
I can see where I am,
go-go, where I am
You'd better look out below

David<~~~~~~really needs to talk to his buddy

Sunday, August 16, 2009

This is a copy of the speech my Mom made at the dinner honoring her and my Father...

What can I say but WOW!!! I am honored that you have chosen Jerry & I for this distinguished honor as “GOOD NEIGHBORS” With the silence at my house lately I have had lots of time to think & ponder about Jerry, our sons David & Mark & mine & Jerry’s life together for 44 years as an Army family. It has been SOME exciting ride!!! Jerry started out as a part of the Army family in1958---but remember Jerry married me when I was only 5 years old (believe that?)
Colonel (RET) Jerry Austin Smith deserves this prestigious “GOOD NEIGHBOR” award and I thank you on his behalf. He was always there to support the Army family in any way he possibly could. If he was still here with us---he would be able to give you such an eloquent speech from his heart and meaning every word of it. He would also be standing here beside me lifting me up---smiling his wonderful smile & telling us all how important each one of us truly are!!! He was the “wind beneath my wings” and we made an awesome couple especially when we were younger. So, I have to take a deep breath---go own without him but know he is truly watching every move I make and giving me encouragement all the way. From the bottom of my heart, I love each one of you and I will try to live up to this most distinguished title of “GOOD NEIGHBOR”. I would like to leave you with this:

Why Don’t You Boogie Through Life
Don’t cry, because its over,
Smile because it happened.
Pain & suffering is enevitable
But Misery is Optional
Yesterday is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery,
Today is a gift.
That’s why it’s called: The Present.
A good exercise for the heart is to
Bend down and help another up.
Life is what you make of it….
Kinda like Play-Dah
The bubbling brook would lose its song
If you removed the rocks.
Happiness comes through doors
You didn’t even know you left open.
Everything is always okay in the end,
If it’s not, then it’s not the end.
If all my friends jumped off a cliff,
I wouldn’t jump with them.
I would be at the bottom to catch them.
Here is a test to find whether your
Mission on earth is finished:
If you’re alive, it isn’t.
So, be happy!
Don’t let anything burst your balloon!
Just Boogie through life!
Have a real happy day today! Enjoy it because you got up this morning.

“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting “WOW, what a ride!”

Thank you.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Took the GF to see a Musical last night...

It was a great night, some of the story was the same as the Disney Movie, but some differed, I think I need to read the book...

David<~~~~~spent twice as much on souvenirs as I did on the tickets

Sunday, August 2, 2009


About two weeks ago I returned home from work to discover a hot pink sticker stuck to my front door. It was from a Process Server named Bev and was about a Defendant named Bryan. It had a case number and a phone number to call. I call the phone number and leave some guy named Kevin a message with my name and my address and my phone number and that I am NOT Bryan and no Bryan lives with me. Three days later Kevin calls back and leaves a voicemail on my cell phone. He thanks me for the information and promises me that he will give Bev the message and that she will call me right back. A week goes by with no contact so I think the issue is over. Then I get a phone number calling me that I don't recognize. So I call it back and get the same Kevin's recorded spiel. Now I'm mad so I hang up. Then I realize I need to leave a message so I can try and get this cleared up so I redial Kevin's phone number. But because the stars are aligned just right I don't hear the phone ring and I actually end up on the speaker phone in Kevin's office as he tries to recruit some dude to be a Process Server for him. Dumbfounded I listen in as my cell phone records about 10 minutes of Kevin's sales pitch to this dude. "You are a Officer of the Court...blah blah blah...give the Summons to anyone over the age of 15...blah blah blah...even if they are not over 15 it's OK, cause you're an Officer of the Court...blah blah blah." It seems the Process Server is an industry full of people with lots of integrity and ethical concerns (insert sarcastic look here). Stunned I go back to my day. Later that evening I'm sitting on my sofa at 11pm when I hear this tap tap tap on my front door. NO WAY! Before I even look out the peephole I know who I'm going to see. Peephole confirmation. There is a lady standing outside with an ID on a chain around her neck holding a clipboard. I'm not ready to receive visitors so I rush about looking for something to throw on when ol' Bev starts to really BANG on my front door at 11pm at night. Geez this half wit is going to wake up everyone in the apartment complex. I open the door and Bev is like 'Name?'. I tell her my name is David and Bev is like 'ID!'. I tell her 'no', then realize I'm only prolonging this SNAFU and tell her to wait. I shut the door and grab my Driver's License and open my front door and tell ol' Bev, "This is NONE of your business, but the only way I'm going to get rid of you is to show you that you are in the wrong place." Bev responds, "I'm an Officer of the Court!". "No you are just a Process Server and you are in the wrong place" She looks at my ID and then starts stammering "The computer shows Bryan is at this address" "I have lived here for 3 years and I have never heard of this Bryan nor seen any mail addressed to him show up here" Looking stricken Bev squeaks out a "Sorry" and I tell her "Good-bye" and shut my door. I'd like to think this issue has been resolved but somehow I imagine I'll be seeing the guy Kevin was trying to recruit sometime in the near future...

Bryan, with Kevin and Bev on the case you could camp out on a billboard next to the Interstate and still sleep like a baby...

David<~~~~~~~~next time I'm calling the Cops on ol' Kevin and Bev and let them explain themselves to Johnny Law

My next door neighbor...

On a whim, I clicked on NEXT BLOG to see who was my Blog Neighbor and this is the result...

As near as I can figure, it's a Blog from a Swedish (???) Tourist currently visiting Ireland...

(Blogs makes strange bedfellows)

David<~~~~~~~~good neighbor!

Friday, July 31, 2009

Six Flags is a magical Magical MAGICAL place...

David<~~~~~~~~Big PIMPIN'!

I got a box in the mail today

It was a Coldwater Creek box that my Mom shipped me. I figured it was either something from Coldwater or Mom reused a box from something she ordered from Coldwater Creek. So I open it and discovered that Mom reused the box to ship me all of my Dad's ties. One of them was still tied, he had just lossened it and put it back on the tie rack that was also in the box. I also received a nice pair of suspenders. I will wear these ties and think of my Father...

I miss my Dad

Thursday, July 30, 2009


OK, you all knew that about me already. I'm a huge fan of Erin Bode, she's a local girl that sings beautifully. She and her band performed at my Store's opening night. Tif and I saw them perform again about a month ago in Festus. Really good. So I get her email newsletter that lets me know where she's playing and she mentions that she's on Facebook. I'M ON FACEBOOK TOO! So of course I look for her and not only find her official "Fan" entry but her personal entry as well. Cool. I joined her Face book fanbase and I also sent a 'friend' request (::crosses fingers and toes::) to her personally. Who knows. Maybe if I'm lucky. So now I'm flipping through her Friends list so see if we have anyone in common and I come across Morgan Freeman. Yes that Morgan Freeman, remember Erin is a really good singer and Morgan is obviousily a fan. So...I fire off another 'friend' request to Mr. Freeman. What a weird day ::wink::

David<~~~~~~~high falutin' and trumpet tootin'

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

I want those who get to know me...


(Adam Ant/Marco Pirroni)

Take it up or leave it
Im not gonna change a bit
If it means heartache
Then leave it out for your sake

I tried and I try tried
To take care of my insides
Nobodys perfect
so leave me if you object

I want those who get to know me
To become admirers or my enemies....

When you're a pirouetting, highkicking, thighslapping cruiser
When youre a hipgrinding, spellbinding, clean cut seducer
You have to be careful
people take note
I take it serious,
but I still like a joke

I want those who get to know me
To become admirers or my enemies

Keep your philosophy
It doesnt apply to me

If it means heartache
Then leave it out for your sake
I tried and I try tried
But still you say that I lied
Nobodys perfect
so leave me if you object

David<~~~~~~~~still dancing!

My Dad!

I have a bad habit...

I bite my fingernails and sometimes I tear the skin around my nails. I just ripped off a loose piece of the cuticle on my left pointer finger. To Snooky I guess it smells like an injury. She is VERY concerned. She keeps trying to smell my finger and stares at it cross-eyed. The only time I have refrained from biting my nails was when I had my fingernails professionally done for the "Wedding Rings" photo when I was married. ::shrugs:: I guess I need to have my nails done...


(btw: TMZ and ET are the DEBIL!)

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Sooooo I'm still alive...


Today was the Artie Lange signing at my Store. We moved 650 Howard Stern fans thru the Book Signing line in one hour and thirty minutes. Only three regretable incidents: 1) a fan tricked a Bookseller into paging someone's name over the Store's intercom that was really a joke. 2) a fan screamed something about "Robin's Boobs" as he left the Store (he used a different word though) and 3) a fan screamed that he loved Artie Lange as he left the Store (what is up with these people who are only brave enough to be rude just as they walk out of the Store?). Lots of girls in 'Catch the eye of the Rock Star' tee shirts. Lots of pick-up trucks in my Parking Lot. Went over very well, my Booksellers ROCK!
Sooooo home relaxin' chillin' on the couch watching live coverage of Comic-Con 09...
WHY AREN'T I ASLEEP???????????????????
David<~~~~is a NERD (and I can't turn it off)

Me and my Dad


David<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~dancing in my head!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

David's EGO gallops past...


Current Country Totals
From 9 Dec 2008 to 1 Jul 2009

United States (US) 1,025
United Kingdom (GB) 9
India (IN) 7
Canada (CA) 7
Japan (JP) 7
Germany (DE) 6
Sweden (SE) 4
Spain (ES) 4
Argentina (AR) 4
Australia (AU) 3
Italy (IT) 3
France (FR) 3
China (CN) 3
Brazil (BR) 3
Chile (CL) 3
Netherlands (NL) 3
Colombia (CO) 3
Finland (FI) 2
Norway (NO) 2
Singapore (SG) 2
Romania (RO) 2
Poland (PL) 2
Malaysia (MY) 2
Czech Republic (CZ) 1
Bulgaria (BG) 1
Austria (AT) 1
Nepal (NP) 1
Venezuela (VE) 1
Philippines (PH) 1
Indonesia (ID) 1
South Africa (ZA) 1
Mexico (MX) 1
Vietnam (VN) 1
Egypt (EG) 1
Greece (GR) 1
New Zealand (NZ) 1
United Arab Emirates (AE) 1
Hong Kong (HK) 1
Portugal (PT) 1

Weirdly enough I'm most pleased with the hit from Bulgaria...

(and as far as Blog Readership goes, mine is tiny)




Rorschach's Journal: Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach. This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save Us!"...

...and I'll look down, and whisper, "No".

Dave Gibbons (ILLUSTRATOR)

Dr. Manhattan



Nite Owl

The Comedian

Alan Moore (CREATOR)