Saturday, December 31, 2005

yanking out nosehairs makes you sneeze...




                                                                     good bye 2005...






Friday, December 30, 2005

Friday Night in BA...

ELDAVO12: life is full of coffee tables in dark rooms
Sonja baby 1972: what smash
SmashThisMirror4: Tammy-my father was very strict- you just did not mess around
Sonja baby 1972: ?
Tammythebratt: Smash, that's a good thing.
Phys1r5: lol indeed lfn, it does appear that humanity goes through a kind of parabola like existence
MrsDorfl: ELD, that's profound. Can I quote you?
ELDAVO12: sure
Phys1r5: old age too will have its great problems
ELDAVO12: start a club
Tammythebratt: I had just turned 15 when I lost the big " V "
SmashThisMirror4: we even had to wear a skirt or dress to dinner every night-ate as a family- NEVER called adults by their first name-ect
ELDAVO12: but I want a cut of the membership fees
OnlineHost: Tyrebitre has entered the room.
Phys1r5: from child to child
Tammythebratt: And that was nothing.
Sonja baby 1972:
Tammythebratt: lol
ELDAVO12: and any royalities of my image
MrsDorfl: {{{{{{{{{{{{{AMEW}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
ELDAVO12: graven or not

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Found a new Adam Ant song!

DOGGY STYLE by Adam Ant/Marco Pirroni

Do not waste my time

By laying out the rules

If you're so intellectual

then you belong in school


Rebop a Bebop

Do it doggy style

I like it better when you're mad

feels so good when you're bad bad bad

Pick your honey up

Never let her go

Say you want an answer

and the answer isn't "no"

Do it doggy style

right across the floor

When you feel exhausted

then you know it's time for more

I wanna see you sweat

Makes you feel so sweet

All that matters is your Manners and Physique

I love it when you tease

adore the times you pose

but I can't kiss a lipstick

or date a pile of clothes


You have a super bod

I saw it so I know

so why the sweats and baggy clothes

Like you don't have to show


Now you've quit the drugs

and the messin' 'round

But you be very careful

that you don't get muscle bound

Pick your honey up

Never let her go

Say you want an answer

and the answer isn't "no"

I wanna see you sweat

That would be real chic

All that really matters

Is your Manners and Physique

You've tuned up everything

tighter than a drum

So why not skip the salad

and come and have some fun

Pick your honey up

Never let her go

Say you want an answer

and the answer isn't "no"

I wanna see you sweat

That would be unique

All that really matters

is your Manners and Physique

Honey kiss on this

Honey suck on that

It's very rich in vitamins

To keep your stomach flat

Pick your honey up

Never let her go

Say you want an answer

and the answer isn't "no"

I wanna see you sweat

that would be unique

all that really matters

is your Manners and Physique


Merry Kwanzanicha!

Well I awoke early this morning (due to an early phone call) to a White Christmas.  Nice.  I'm going to go see Memoirs of a Geisha.  A friend of mine tells me it's lovely.  So far today I have fried bacon for breakfast and mic'ed a bowl of soup for lunch.  ::shrugs::  Heck I'm still in my Sloppy Joe's tee shirt and sleep pants from last night... I'm jumping into the shower and then I'm off to see if there are any food joints open on this National Holiday... Wish me luck.


David the bachelor



Saturday, December 24, 2005

It's Christmas Eve...

I closed at work today.  I sent people home early once it became obvious that we weren't going to make the huge plan number I was given.  As we were straightening up the store, we found a hundred dollar hardbound Bible and CD set that someone had stolen.  I was the one that waited on her.  Bibles are the number one stolen book in my company.  We also have had a rash of hateful people trying to start fights because we wish people "Happy Holidays" over the intercom during our store announcements.  Gotta love the Christian spirit.  And for the record there is no "War on Christmas".  But there is an organized agenda by the Religious Right to force everyone to bow to their wishes.  Our American Taliban has Pat Robertson as it's leader., and the Rev. Phelps is one of the dog soldiers.  ::climbs down off of my soapbox::  I took the little Poinsettia plant home with me tonight.  I had put it on the break room table as a center piece for the Pizza Party that I bought as my Christmas present to all my associates.  Leaving the store it was starting to drizzle.  Funny weather for Dec 24th in Missouri.  I ate dinner in Chili's and read my newest White Dwarf magazine.  They have new figs coming out for the Dwarves, things like that make me smile (David<~~~nerd).  Then I drove up to the Walgreen's at Gravois Bluffs and did some grocery shopping, Dierbergs had already closed because of the Holiday.  The three cute little brunettes that were Walgreen's cashiers tonight all had on matching handmade Christmas tee shirts, they were in a good mood.  I pushed the miniature shopping cart around the store as I picked up some food to eat on Christmas Day.  I might go to a movie tomorrow, or watch an all day movie marathon on one of the cable channels.  I loaded all the bags into my car and noticed that it's raining harder now.  Driving home the radio tells me that it's going to drop to 30 degrees tonight.  A "White Christmas" is a distinct probability.  I arrive home and put away the groceries.  As I load my cookie jar I justify eating the Double Stuffed Oreos that have chipped edges because they aren't "perfect".  I'm a noble creature at heart...  I peel off my work clothes and 'don me now my gay apparel' Fa La La, La La La, La, La, La...  Sitting here in my Sloppy Joes tee and my Chinese Take-Out sleep pants I realize that I have an OK life.  I want to take this time to wish all my friends and family a Happy Holidays and a Merry Christmas!  This is David Austin Smith, signing off...



Thursday, December 22, 2005

Hear Ye, Hear Ye, the Great Laundry Boil in now in session...

Gentlemen this is your assignment if you chose to accept it...  It's 1300 hrs and the laundry needs doing.  It's a tuff job and some of you won't make it back alive...  You have trained for this mission and it is time, Good Luck and God Speed!


duck and roll, lock and load, fold and fluff... Commander David signing off...

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

I'm always ready for another round ::dances on my tippy toes as I shadow box in the ring::

Me And My Foolish Heart


My foolish heart keeps a vigil

standing ready, always searching

does he know what's best for me

or is he selfish, blind and needy

He sends a thrill throughout my body

at the slightest glance or imagined smile

If I didn't need him, I'd set him down

It's too hard to struggle through his mistakes

paying the cost for his recklessness

I have seen the damage firsthand

what an unchained heart can do

but he still stands watch 

and he helps me

write it all down in my journal

sketch it all quickly with my pencil

take the pictures that I love to frame

empathize with my friends when they are hurting

and he does make me feel

like I am alive...

is the price worth it

in the end it's just me


and my foolish heart

Tired but I can't sleep...

I fell asleep after I got off from work and slept 5+ hrs and now I can't get any rest...


2:56am on Wednesday and I want to go to sleep...

Monday, December 19, 2005

Something cool happened today, remind me someday and I'll tell you a story.


I am sleepy, but my foolish heart is dancing...


Saturday, December 17, 2005

::the sound of shattering glass:: Dawn is breaking...

It's 6:19am and I just woke up.  The beast lurches from it's den.  I have to go knock the mud off and dress up all business like and hoof it off to the gainful employment.  ::sigh::  I'm tired.  It's Saturday and we should be pretty busy though, so that will be nice.  Time to make the donuts!


David, but just barely...



Friday, December 16, 2005

I have the day off!

















I just discovered a new Adam Ant song...


(and I love it)




Thursday, December 15, 2005

"...and the good guys hate the bad guys, and we call this making history..."

Yesterday I went to see King Kong.  If you have to choose between a root channel and seeing King Kong at the Movie Theatre, call your dentist.  It is the worst film I have seen YTD (and that includes all the junk on cable).  I am all for the suspension of belief, but I don't want belief to be "hung by the neck till it's dead..." 


"You might not like it now but you will..."


Did I mention that I am the biggest Adam Ant fan in all of Missouri?  I'm pretty sure I have a shot at the biggest fan in all of the MidWest...but I don't want to seem the braggart.  "Dirk wears white socks"...ok I'm done being a New Wave Nerd.


Why do I like Adam Ant so much?  That's easy, Adam was different and he made it easier for me to be different.  Someone else already was...


David<~~~~~~~~~~as different as they come

(I look normal don't I?  heeheheeheheehehee...)


I'm listening to the REDUEX Cd right now, "MOHAWK"!  Ok I wasn't done being a New Wave Nerd...


...two drummers, how can you not like that sound?


Just got off from work, I have my eyes closed and I'm listening to Adam Ant original recordings and it doesn't get much better than this...


(all quotations are song lyrics by adam)

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

One Two Three O'Clock Four O'Clock Rock...

I am tired.  I sit here with my companion, I shall call him Grape Cream Slush, and I fight back the advance of gravity.  Gravity that attempts to close my eyelids like an old garage door opener that is about due to be replaced.  Slowly and in fits and starts.  I clear my throat.  I sound like an old man sitting in the waiting room at the Geriatric Outreach Center who has spent a lifetime shouting out his bets at the racetrack and chain smoking.  It's a living.  I regret a lot of things I have done in my life.  I also regret lots of things that I did not do.  Regret is like an old pair of underwear.  It's faded and torn and you should throw it away, but it's comfortable so you keep it around.  Some times I fancy myself a poet, and then other times I know better...


as always I am David...




Monday, December 12, 2005

ho Ho HO!

OK, it's official.  I have weird friends.  Someone that knew me in College sent me a package today.  Sitting on my doorstep was a box filled with:


numerous bar towels (used to pack the following items)

9 round Shakespeare's Pizza coasters

6 glass Shakespeare's Pizza glasses

4 "Shirt Shaped" Shakespeare's Pizza coasters (that I am supposed to 'dip in water to see what happens', but I am afraid to...)

3 pkgs of chop sticks

2 restaurant table shakers (one with grated Parmesan Cheese the other with coarse Red Pepper)

1 round plastic ashtray (like you find in restaurants)

1 plastic Lobster Bib

0 note or explanation of who it is from...




I highly suspect my brother Mark, "Hey Butt Nut, are you behind this?"




Sunday, December 11, 2005

We are getting busy at the bookstore!

I think I'm going to frame the printed copies of the fundraising brochure that Dan sent me.  Is there no end to my vanity?  Doesn't appear so...  I saw Good Night and Good Luck tonight, it was filmed in black and white and is a pretty good movie.  Really takes you back to the time when there was an ignorant political figure trying to control the USA through fear, lies, and intimidation...


We are at a junction in the US, it is time to take back our moral center from the people who would twist our country into something they would like it to be, something smaller and not as intelligent as we could be.  I for one do not want to turn the clock back to the Inquisition...


                                   David<~~~~~~standing on his soapbox!


Still have my tie on from work, reclining on my sofa pecking away at the keys on this here new fangled MAchine... 7:26pm on Sunday December 11th.



Saturday, December 10, 2005



two sets of keys





business card holder

more receipts

a name and a phone number

a wallet

a hankerchief

and a promise

all my wordly goods summed up

I set them on the bookshelf

and wonder what to do next



I have a day off, and it's Saturday!

I saw Narnia last night, it was wonderful.  Watching the Witch fight with two swords alone is worth the price of admission...


Sitting on my sofa at 7:18 am on a lazy Saturday morning contemplating going out for brunch...



Wednesday, December 7, 2005

I think I figured out what is wrong with my scale...

Both belts I purchased at Target.  The reversible belt broke...and the first belt I bought is seperating...  The moral of this story, don't buy belts at Target.  ::shrugs::

Monday, December 5, 2005

Home sick today

My scale is broke, something is wrong with it, I need to buy a new one...::sigh::  My ring is loose.  When I gained all the weight in Omaha I paid to have it enlarged.  Now I almost lose it everyday.  I'm going to have to have it made smaller...::sigh::  I'm sick.  I have taken two naps already this morning and plan to take another one, I feel like poo-poo...::sigh::


Sitting here in yesterday's wrinkled clothes with a pounding headache at 2:24pm on Monday Dec 5th...





Sunday, December 4, 2005





Do trees dream

as they sleep away the winter

are their nocturnal thoughts kept

in the tiniest piece of splinter


When their branches sway

are they acting out a memory

when the wind interrupts their sleep

are they really trying to get free


Free to run and laugh

as we are want to do

what we take for granted

our whole life through


I watch the trees and wonder

why I care at all

why I think these things

at the end of every fall


Is it because I see in them

a little piece of me

an understanding of what it is

a yearning to be set free


To try for something different

something I haven’t had yet

friendship love and laughter

a promise not quite met


So I watch the trees sleeping

and swaying with the wind

dreaming of running and laughter

and good times that never end


I smile and I know their longings

I know what makes them sway

I smile because I understand

I dream exactly the same way



Friday, December 2, 2005

The Thief of Hearts

I stumble barefoot across the frozen ground, stubbing my toe on an exposed tree root.  The bitter December air steals my breath away.  I turn in a circle underneath the tree and the full moon illuminates the table and chairs right before I would have tripped over them.  Startled I sit down at one of the chairs and the cold metal bites me through my pajama pants.  I notice the pack of sealed playing cards on the table at the same time that he speaks.  “Hello David”, is all he says as he pulls out the other chair.  Time sits down across from me.  He props himself up in the chair and I admire the gold gilding of his oval frame.  Time is a mirror.  He smiles at me and I think, was I ever that young?  I notice he has a bit of pepper in his teeth, so I clean it away with the edge of a card.  The deck is in my hand, I don’t remember picking it up.  The wind rolls a small piece of cellophane across the table and pulls at the bottom of my tee shirt and I shudder.  Time makes faces at me and I deal out the cards.  Laughing, Time has five cards and I only have three.  It doesn’t seem fair.  He shows me his hand.  The Queen of Hearts has two dogs sitting next to her, she is smiling.  The Queen of Clubs has a bent corner.  The Queen of Diamonds is red-faced and is attended by two mute Pages.  His final two cards are both jokers, he seems to have the winning hand.  I stare at my three cards.  One is a photograph of a little boy crying standing next to his tormenter; his Mother must have taken the picture.  The other card is a scrap of paper torn from a journal with the words “I remember” written across it.  The final card is the Thief of Hearts and I recognize the profile I see printed there.  I look underneath the table for my other two cards but all I see is the frost glittering in the moonlight.  I try to protest the rules of the game, but my voice comes out as a warm vapor that hangs in the air, not a single sound do I utter.  I stare at Time and I wonder how long am I supposed to  just sit here?  Off in the distance I hear a wind chime and I smile.  I fold my hand and deal myself a new set of cards, this game isn’t over yet…

Thursday, December 1, 2005

Mr. Grinch ate a rat pinkie today...

I am scanning in the picture of the letter that Mt. Olive sent me a while back, I forgot to put it in my journal.  Here it is as promised...

I finally heard back from the guy that wanted to use my pic in the fund raising brouchure...

Here is what he wrote in the email...



After many months of back and forth sessions with the Edison-Ford
people, they have decided not to print the brochure.  However the
design was finished and I am attaching a PDF file that shows your
photograph in the layout of the brochure.

Good luck with your new career as professional photographer!

d a n f i n n e y
Dan Finney Design, Inc.


LOL, why do I get so excited about a photo that didn't even get used?  David<~~~~~Nerd!



Tuesday, November 29, 2005




I live inside my head

and dance in my imagination

imagining lives I might have lead

if I had indulged every infatuation


I live inside my heart

and think of things gone by

and wonder where I'd be

if I had only given it a try


I live inside my head

wandering down memory lane

looking at possible lives

if I'd sung a different refrain


I live inside my heart

not a bad place to be

I'm used to the company

David, myself and me


I live inside my head

but wish to travel else where

I look for new adventures

and paths to lead me there


I live inside my heart

and laugh out loud a lot

I smile at the possibilities

and am grateful for what I've got


I live inside my head

so please cut me some slack

come join in my adventures

I might not be coming back


I live inside my heart

and long for a companion

one who loves just like me

not afraid to jump the canyon


I live inside my head

seperate from most of the folks

I need a good hearted woman

who will laugh at most of my jokes


I live inside my heart

and invite you to come with me

as I walk the roads of whimsy

letting my mind loose to run free


I live inside my head

and I want you to come and see

won't you hold my hand

and dance right along beside me


Let's have some fun together

there's nothing at all to dread

Friendship, Love, and Laughter

just inside my heart and head...


I don't know when people read my journal

I was reading old comments that friends have left, it's nice to know when my Journal is read...


Here are some pictures my Dad took on my camera Nov 1st during my FRIENDS AND FAMILY event...



I'm editing my journal and cleaning up old entries...

My Heart Knows You


The random melody of wind chimes

swaying in the breeze

on a warm spring morning

that is how my heart knows you

The musical laughter of a little boy

as he watches a ladybug

take flight from his fingertips

that is how my heart knows you

The tiny flashes of light on wave tips

moving across an autumn lake

as the sun goes down

that is how my heart knows you

The stark outline of a bare forest

standing still and quiet in a field of snow

at midnight with a full moon

that is how my heart knows you


::checks my watch:: It's time to get a haircut!

I bought another belt so I have a brown one now (and black, it's reversible!)  David<~~~~Nerd.  My weight goal is 250, right before the holiday I weighed in at 260 (a new record for me), but I might have overeaten a teeny tiny bit at Geoff's Mom's house on Thanksgiving ::holds my fingers very close together and peeks between them::  ::shrugs::  It's a process and I am happy with the results so far, I can actually see me reaching my target weight.  Then I'll set myself a new goal...  ::wink:: LOL.  Before I never understood people who went on and on about their weight.  In my head I didn't think I could accomplish what they were doing, but now, I can see results and I have a taste of success.  ::BIG GRIN::  My store is doing pretty good.  I am not doing the volume I want but my people are doing a great job on selling Membership Cards (we are currently leading the Region in Membership Card percent (out of 125 stores).  Our lower volume makes the percentage higher when you divide it out (gotta love math!).  On GREEN FRIDAY we went in at 3am and opened the Cafe at 4am to sell to Best Buy's Early Bird line.  It was a huge success.  I ended up missing second place in volume by 971 bucks and if I hadn't been so stingy with payroll we could have done that easy.  I did open the store at 7am (we were supposed to open at 8, but I couldn't stand watching customers walk past my doors).  As soon as my Music Manager arrived I had him count down a drawer and we opened.  ::shrugs::  I had a visit yesterday by three of our Corporate Guys, one being a VP.  We did great.  I am very proud of my people, they are doing an excellent job.  This weekend there is a direct mail flyer going out to all the homes in the area around my store so that should drive business through my doors.  The above picture is of Mr. Grinch:  "Man's Best Friend", an Albino Argentinian Horned Frog!  I only have the one exotic frog at the moment.  I have been eyeing some Geckos...


David 8:26 on Tuesday Morning, in my sleep pants and wearing a tee shirt with a guy in a suit pointing to some words in an open book and the caption reads, "You're not only WRONG, the rules also say you're a DICK!"

Sunday, November 20, 2005

I have today off (well kind of...)

I didn't use the Noche Flamenca tickets that Christine gave me.  David<~~~~~~bad boy.  I don't like going to functions by myself...

Friday, November 18, 2005

a little catch up (or maybe mustard)

MY HEART FORGETS (version 9.0)

As light as a kiss brushing against my cheek
and from the edge a tear begins to leak
My heart forgets

As soon as a ragged heart can heal
and soft as a fingertip can feel
My heart forgets

As the recent pain is lost
and I fail to remember the cost
My heart forgets

As easy as a lace curtain blows
and quick as a mountain stream flows
My heart forgets

As subtle as the songbird sings
and bright as the light it brings
My heart forgets

As I begin a brand new day
and try to find a brand new way
My heart forgets

As my ears rejoice at the laughter
and my heart yearns for what comes after
My heart forgets

As simple as it is for me to do this
and as foolish as it is for me to do this
My heart forgets

As I strive to love again with all my heart
and I need to try again right from the start
My heart forgets

As my heart wishes for what it needs
And my heart again plants the seeds
My heart forgets

So if you see it wandering there
Acting as if it just hasn't a care
I really haven't lost my wits

You see it's just because
My heart forgets


I am a bit behind in putting my thoughts down on my journal.  I have been busy and AOL wasn't playing nice the other day and wouldn't let me add a new entry.  A lot has happened since my last entry.  I bought a new belt, I got tired of my pants falling off.  One of the crappy parts about losing weight is that your clothes don't fit anymore.  I have to buy new pants, none of my pants will stay on unless I cinch my belt all the way to my waist.  I hate wasting the money I paid for all my pants, ::sigh:: oh well.  I went out on a date last weekend.  She was nice but we weren't compatible.  I'm happy to report I can be taught.  LOL.  I spent 10 years of my life with Mary, trying to make her happy, all for naught.  Very little sex, NO marriage, NO children.  But Mary is a nice person, so she cut me loose so I could look for someone who could make me happy.  Then I go out with Natalie for a year, and eventually have to admit that I was not happy in a relationship with her (10 yrs cut down to 1, I'm improving).  Then I get married.  My wife was NOT a nice person.  I lied to myself and said "she will quit these behaviors when she realizes that I'm a nice guy and she doesn't HAVE to be this way...".  ERRRRRRRRRRRRRNG!  Thanks for playing.  I wasted less than a year on that attempt, so I am getting better.  I am not going to settle anymore.  NBD, no harm no fowl (quack quack).  So now I'm looking...AGAIN.  It still sucks to be alone.  Tonight I made the best bologna sandwich I have ever made.  Here is how you make it:

1)      Two pieces of Italian bread

2)     Two pieces of all beef bologna

3)     Mayo (no wimpy Mircle Whip for yours truely)

4)     Freshly ground sea salt

5)     Two thin slices of onion

6)     A bit of pepper 


(the trick is to put Mayo on both slices of bread... ::taps the side of my nose:: )


I had no one to take a bite of my sandwich with me, then I would have had confirmation that I had indeed made the perfect bologna sandwich.  One of the hazards of being single.  I watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind tonight.  I loved his attempt to hang on to the memories of the woman he loved. 

                           Never Never Never Quit

I have two tickets to see the FlamingoDancers tomorrow night, another sucky thing about being single, no one to go to functions with...  Ok time for the whiny part of this journal to end  ::snaps the clapboard on this production::


David 8:41 pm Friday November 18th and it's cold outside...


Tuesday, November 8, 2005

David has a day off!



A new day is dawning

the Autumn sun is shining

a crisp breeze is blowing

and November is smiling


New colors are showing

fall coats they're wearing

the trees are laughing

good times they're sharing


The wind is inviting

the trees are agreeing

the forest is dancing

and the leaves are leaving


I love this season

a special time I hold dear

Autumn is my favorite

favorite time of the year


So slow down a bit

and take a look around

stroll through the leaves

that have fallen on the ground


We have but a short time

to enjoy the season

so take a day off

can't think of a better reason




Thursday, November 3, 2005

Friends and Family went well...

The preview night and my Grand Opening yesterday went well.  I am very tired.  I filled up both of my memory cards in my camera, I will download them as soon as I have a bit of time and then post them on this journal...  Thanx to all my friends and family that turned up for the party, your support was appreciated!




Friday, October 28, 2005

The Inventory went well, I have A LOT of merchandise...



The Inventory went well, we started at 8am and finished at about 3pm.  38 Inventory counters and I had 35 of my folks there to help out.  I have a lot of merchandise dollars in my store... :)



Thursday, October 27, 2005

This morning I go in to oversee my inventory

I'll be glad when the inventory is over so we can get back to polishing the apples...

Wednesday, October 26, 2005








I drag my eyelids

across sand encrusted eyes

I push my body

before me throughout my day

I worry about things

that I have no experience of

I dread possible failure

and losing my job

I watch my people struggle

and I try to help them

I put on a brave face

and make light of my situation

I am a store manager

I push on...




Early in the morning and I can't sleep...








Thursday, October 20, 2005

I'll try to take pictures this morning of how far we are along with the store...

I try to weigh myself every morning so I have a consistent time of day to compare my progress against.  I am working a lot of hrs and not eating as much as I normally do.  I need to add in some walking and I might even ::gasp:: join a gym.  Weight training and martial arts are on my mind lately.  Who would have ever thought I would even consider joining a gym?  ::shakes head::



Saturday, October 15, 2005

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Monday, October 10, 2005



As light as a kiss brushing against my cheek
and when the edge of my eye begins to leak
My heart forgets

As soon as a ragged heart can heal
and soft as a fingertip can feel
My heart forgets

As the recent pain is lost
and I fail to remember the cost
My heart forgets

As easy as the curtains blow
and quick as a stream will flow
My heart forgets

As subtle as the songbird sings
and bright as the light it brings
My heart forgets

As I begin a brand new day
and try to find a brand new way
My heart forgets

As my ears rejoice at the laughter
and my heart yearns for what comes after
My heart forgets

As simple as it is for me to do this
and as foolish as it is for me to do this
My heart forgets

As I strive to love again with all my heart
and I need to try again right from the start
My heart forgets

As my heart wishes for what it needs
And my heart again plants the seeds
My heart forgets

So if you see it wandering there
Acting as if it didn't have a care
I really haven’t lost my wits

You see it’s just because
My heart forgets



We finish up the OPS portion today, books arrive tomorrow...

I ate two fortune cookies last night, this is what the fortunes read:











Sunday, October 9, 2005

And September Remains




The setting sun backlights

Pale lavender clouds

White edged against

A periwinkle sky

The sun dips below

Hiding behind the trees

A stark green outline

An after image of summer

And September remains


The leaves remember

Waiting for their chance

To travel on the wind

And gather with their kin

Returning to their autumn beds

Waiting for next year…

The season turns

The sun has set

And September remains



I took possession of my new store on Thursday ::jingles the store keys::

My new store is SOOOOOOOOO pretty...

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

Last night I attended the Grand Opening Party for our new store in St. Peters

Here are some pictures I took of the St. Pete party last night.

I am trying something new...

Howdy Faithful Readers,


    I am adding a new feature to my entries.  Every time I add a new entry, I will put my current weight in the second line of the Journal Title.  I am currently on the "Opening a New Store Jitters Diet".  LOL.  At my heaviest I was 318, I have lost a bunch of weight since starting on the New Store Opening process.  My goal is 250.  I have come to the conclusion that my fat belly is part of the problem of finding a new woman for myself (the other part is that I'm still married, gonna fix that soon).  So I'm focusing on my weight and trying to cut back on portion size and I'm working more hrs and that is helping a lot.  ::shrugs::  It can't hurt...



Saturday, October 1, 2005

Brian Setzer Rocks the HOUSE!


The Brian Setzer Orchestra was GREAT!  They only played for an hour [  corportate gig :(  ], but they were wonderful.  There was a Store Manager from NY that brought her black lace dress to the concert, kinda made it hard to concentrate.  Alan Alda was so personable in person.  I can't wait to read his book.  I fly back to STL tomorrow morning...


Whoops I forgot...

Tonight we have Alan Alda speaking to our Meeting, and The Brian Setzer Orchestra will play for us...


::lacing up my dancing shoes!::



Yesterday we had the Publisher's Rotations, Tradeshow, and the Author signings...

Yesterday was my busiest day at the Conference.  I was running till 10pm.  I did get to meet and have the following authors sign books for me:  Robert Hicks (The Widow of the South), Laurie Notaro (An Idiot Girl's Christmas), Terry Pretchett (Thud!), Vince Flynn (Consent to Kill), Mairia Kalman (Elements of Style), Christopher Paolini (Eldest), Bill Rancic (Beyond the Lemonade Stand {he's the winner of Apprentice}), Kim Harrison (Every Which Way but Dead), Brad Meltzer (Identity Crisis), and the lady who writes the "Angelina the Mouse" series (I already packed and shipped her book so I can't check ::sigh:: ).  I'm handing them out to my buddies, my Management team at the store, and the remainder I will hand out as prizes to my Booksellers...


::tired grin::




Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Made it here, everything is looking great

I am staying at the Westin Diplomat, it's pretty fancy smancy... here is a link if you want to see where I'm at, some goofball forgot to bring his digital camera...::sigh::

Westin Diplomat


yak at cha later gator...(get it? Gator, I'm in Florida....)



Monday, September 26, 2005

Tomorrow morning I load up and fly to Ft. Lauderdale

I load up tomorrow morning and fly to Ft. Lauderdale for our National Sales Meeting.  I'm going a day early because I'm a new Store Manager that hasn't been thru a Christmas yet with the company.  I will be bringing home LOTS of books to give away to my friends and give out as prizes during the training of the store's booksellers...




Saturday, September 24, 2005

We had our first Management Meeting in our new store...

On Monday there are 11 18-Wheelers arriving to unload the fixtures for the store!

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Lightning is striking all over town


And I Drive...


It's late at night and I'm in my car

the sky is uniform and dark

with the moon peering out between the clouds 

the storm is far away and doesn't concern me

something that happens to other people

and I drive...


My car smells new and clean

rolling whisper quiet along the highway

the world only exists inside my headlights

an explorer in the interstate darkness

traveling the space between lamp posts

and I drive...


In the distance an angry jagged line

touches down and jumps in place

burning an after image in my eye

pale white ghost of a lightning strike

so far away there is no sound

and I drive...


Catalina jazz is playing on my radio

I stop at a light, the only one here

watch the light change from red to green

then yellow and red again,  and I look around

I am all alone, no one to keep waiting

and I drive...


I pass other cars, other people

shining their lights past me

looking for their way to go

red eyes that retreat into the night

leaving me alone again

and I drive...


Far away lightning backlights the sky

showing me the outline of the storm

I check for my friend the moon

and he is there, smiling down on me

I turn my car towards home

and I drive...







I have been 40 for 12 hrs now ::shrugs:: it's no big deal...

I have been 40 for a little over 12 hrs now.  LOL...  My ex-fiance Mary called me last night to wish me a Happy Birthday, Jen a co-worker just called and my folks called too.  For a second I started getting down on myself over failed relationships, but then I remembered my greatest failure was also my greatest it all evens out...  I cleaned the bathroom, and I am going to clean out my car today and finally buy a hubcap for my ugly nekkid wheel.  I am SO not a car guy.  I may go out to eat this evening and see a movie.  I have to pick up Ray at the airport at midnight tonight, and I have an early Manager's meeting in the morning (HELLO 7am!).  All in all, I have a good life and I am happy to be in the game...


::throws the dice::




[David<~~lucky guy]



Saturday, September 17, 2005

The Dragonfly With The Shining Eyes


The Dragonfly With The Shining Eyes


The sights of summer call out to me

I hear the chorus of cicadas, the trill of the frogs

as I walk through the lush green of late summer

and then...

She flies into view

A beautiful Dragonfly, silver and black

sleek and fast as she bursts from the gloom

she flies to just within reach

and she stops

humming there in front of my face

watching me with her laughing eyes 

full of mischief and light

I want to reach out my hand

but I hesitate...

what if I frighten her?

what if she flies away?

I would never see her again

and that is something I cannot risk

so I sit


and I wait


content to be near

and waiting for the chance

to offer my hand

to the Dragonfly with the shining eyes




My Aunt Betty took me out to lunch today for my birthday


My Aunt Betty called and invited me to lunch to celebrate my 40th Birthday.  We chose the buffet at a truck stop in Gray's Summit.  Then we meandered through Shaw Nature Preserve, it was really pretty there.  I saw a Black Snake, but I wasn't quick enough with my camera to catch it on film.  Earlier this week I was feeling a little down about being by myself on my birthday, but I have preservered and I feel better now.  I will let you know if I feel different tomorrow at 12:01 am when I turn the big four ohhhh.  It could be worse...I could be unemployed, I could be in an abusive relationship, I could have cancer.  Lots of things to be happy about!  I have a poem rattling around in my head I may try to scribble down...



Wednesday, September 14, 2005

The Job Fair went very well!

I'm still a bit tired (9 to 9 was a bit long).  We found 93 people that we are interested in.  We have 12 or so applicants that we are interested in that had to leave and couldn't wait to be interviewed.  We are setting up interviews with those folks today.  I am very happy with how the Job Fair turned out...


Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I have my Job Fair today!

Today my management staff and I (and a few volunteers from other stores) will put on 100 associates for my new store in Fenton.  Wish me luck!



Saturday, September 10, 2005

I went to the Clayton Art Fair tonite...

I drove to Clayton to see their Art Fair.  I love art, and I have been meaning to see this fair.  I don't like to do stuff like this alone, so I haven't been before.  I forced myself to go.  I was hoping to see a friend that was supposed to go, but no such luck.  ::shrugs::  There were LOTS of great artists, bands and I saw a dance troupe called MadCo that were excellent.  Angels with dirty feet.  Clayton is pretty upscale and I felt a bit out of place.  A lot of silicone on display, enough to keep Mattel supplied in raw materials for a year.  A lot of older couples standing around reliving their Fraternity and Sorority days.  Not my crowd.  If you ever see me standing in a small group of people with a wine glass in my hand trying to keep myself from falling by grasping a linen covered cocktail table...shoot me.  I did see lots of paintings and photographs that I wanted, but I have no room to put them up.  I still have a ton of art I have already purchased that I need to frame...


Friday, September 9, 2005

I am wore the heck out!

I took my management staff over to Lynn's store (her's opens up a month before mine), to help unload the supply truck that arrived today.  It went pretty well, I am very proud of my folks...


When I was a kid in Ft. Leavenworth, KS. I entered the Ronald McDonald Happy Meal Joke Contest.  I sent in my joke, they liked it, put it in the jokebook that came free with a Happy Meal, and sent me some Ronald McDonald gift certificates totaling $5.00!  Hey big spenda...


"Did you hear about the Farmer that was outstanding in his field?"




::shrugs::  It still counts as a published joke! Hehehehe...

Tuesday, September 6, 2005

Monday, September 5, 2005

Labor Day Weekend Movie Marathon

This weekend I saw four, yes I said FOUR, movies.  In no particular order:

The Cave...started off in a nice manner but the suspension of disbelief after a while could have spanned the Atlantic Ocean (the Suspension of Disbelief Bridge!).  Basically an Alien rip-off with shades of Species, been there seen the monsters already...

Undiscovered...A nice little romantic romp.  Boy Meets Girl, Girl Falls for Boy, Boy Falls for Girl, Intervening Cirmustances Prevent Love Affair, Love Conquors All...::bats eyes::...

Broken Flowers...A wonderfully dry ::spits dust:: comedy about past lovers staring Bill Murry ::standing ovation::...

The Constant Gardener...The best of the lot, Finnes' best work since the English Patient.  Excellent love story, with intrigue, murder, spies, and Corporate Greed thrown in for good measure.  EVERYONE should go see this movie...

Saturday, September 3, 2005

My See-Thru Heart of Clay

My See-Thru Heart of Clay


A man of grey

lives in the world today

and he holds a secret


He keeps it close

safe near it's host

his see-thru heart of clay


Fired in the furnace

polished and burnished

with it's bright red coat of glaze


If you hold it up right

and peer thru the light

the world seems almost ok


Happy and carefree

or so it seems to me

till you notice the fray


The bits and pieces

the fracture increases

it gives the repairs away


He didn't hold on tight

and it wasn't always right

and sometimes it had it's way


Leaping too soon

his heart carried the tune

and jumped to unhearing women


Saw his love discarded

unheard and disregarded

much to his heart's dismay


He drops to the ground

frantically groping around

trying to save the day


He winces at the sound

of it breaking on the ground

his see-thru heart of clay


He knows what to do

reaches for the jar of glue

to mend it once again


He grips it tight

it sets thru the night

and it almost seems ok


He tries to use more care

a perfect heart it seems is rare

and his has seen some changes


He's kept it on his sleeve

not as safe as you'd believe

and sometimes it got broken


He's kept it locked away

his see-thru heart of clay

and it strained at the treatment


Wishing to be free

wanting the world to see

the colors that it reflected


He holds it up high

so the light catches the eye

revealing all his inner feelings


All the fears and the worries

all the love and the stories

everything that he has to give


You see I am the man of grey

that lives in the world today

and I hold a secret


I have something here

a treasure that I hold dear

wouldn't you like to see it


I'll reveal it to you this one time

so you can hear it's shining rhyme

this is what I have to show you


my secret heart

my imperfect heart

My see-thru heart of clay


Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Lost In A Circle

Lost In A Circle


i was lost in a circle

couldn't see my way out

i ran to get to out of there

ended up just turning about

i was lost in a circle

could hear her angry shouts

worthless stupid and unloveable

always ready for another bout

i was lost in a circle

trying to talk my way free

explaining loving and comforting

wasn't something she liked to see

i was lost in a circle

wearing a rut into the floor

round and round the same issues

i just couldn't take it any more

i was lost in a circle

the only one trying to hold on

thinking she'd change her assaults

when she realized the need was gone

i was lost in a circle

wearily i trudged along

i'm not the divorcing kind

but the abuse was just plain wrong

i was lost in a circle

till i realized this one thing

I am worth loving

I am worth more than this ring

now I'm not lost in a circle

all I had to do was stop

stop taking all the insults

stop taking all the chops

the chops to my ego

the chops to my pride

the chops to my self

the chops out of my hide

I'm not lost in a circle

I still hold the institution dear

I just need to find a better woman

one to love and hold me near

I'm not lost in a circle

I'm just looking for the one

the one to hold my hand

the one to bear me a girl and a son

I'm not lost in a circle

I think marriage is just fine

I'm not lost in a circle

and I will have a family that is all mine...




Sunday, August 28, 2005

The Evansville Training trip turned out ok...

The first day I was standing outside my Hotel waiting for my ride.  There was a large colorful butterfly circling the flowers next to the sidewalk.  I watched him for 10 minutes.  That evened up the score from the rest of the issues of the Evansville trip...





Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Someone figured out how to use the "Macro" feature on his digital camera...

The Evansville Training Trip is cursed, CURSED I SAY!

Well I made it to Evansville finally, it's starting to look like a Hee Haw episode..."If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all".  Here is a running total of the issues I have run into trying to go to this training...


1)     The Regional Asst. forgot to book my travel arrangements two weeks ago

2)     Due to interviewing management candidates my training was delayed by 1 week, so I was not prepared to go to Evansville and get my MOD training

3)     My Mod training is delayed one week

4)     My expense check from my first training trip had not arrived, I have to pay for meals and other expenses out of pocket so I was not prepared to go to Evansville and get my MOD training

5)     My paycheck did not arrive last Friday so I was not prepared to go to Evansville and get my MOD training

6)     My paycheck did not arrive last Saturday so I was not prepared to go to Evansville and get my MOD training

7)     My paycheck finally arrives yesterday, delaying my departure for Evansville by one day

8)     The airlines loses my luggage, they promise to deliver it to my room at my hotel

9)     The room was not direct billed correctly so I had to wait 45 minutes till I could check in

10)    ???


[tune in faithfull readers for next's week's episode "David gets food poisoning in Indiana"]




Monday, August 22, 2005

I found this picture on the internet

So You know...


Walking along a hedgerow

passing by the gate you know

Spying a little man just so

working on a shoe you know

Know of him by his clothes

get my share of loot you know

Catching him before he blows

gonna get some gold you know

The lies he tells sure do grow

never set him down you know

Clutch him close till he throws

down his beloved pot you know

Snatching pearls up in a row

Grabbing lots of gold you know

Set him down, now he blows

Yes I'm rich so you know

As he leaves a curse he throws

bad deal I made so you know

Now all my life is full of woe

tricky he is so you know

Now my beard it does grow

nothing left to have you know

Curse the day I met this Trow

ruined my life so you know...



Tuesday, August 16, 2005

New pictures of my store in Fenton

The Union is picketing the Old Navy, they are using non-Union workers...

Last night, Ameren UE came and fixed the downed powerlines in my backyard!

Fey Little PowerMen


In the middle of the night

hiding and just out of sight

The fey little PowerMen did appear

With a twinkle in their eye

and without as much as a sigh

My problem they did make disappear

Bounding from my sleep I awoke

and my 'tricity was no longer broke

The little PowerMen must have drawn near

the tree had been whacked

and the wood had been stacked

I have nothing else left to fear

So thank you to Ameren-U-E

for fixing my toppled tree

In my heart I will hold you dear...



Isn't LIFE interesting?


I received an email from a guy interested in using one of my photos...

(he writes)


I am designing a new brochure for the non-profit Edison-Ford Winter
Estates Foundation, the brochure is for fundraising purposes.  I am
having trouble finding a good picture of the banyan tree that we can
get to quickly and I saw your great photo online.  I would like your
permission to use your photo in the brochure.  As the designer, I
cannot offer you anything in return other than a few copies of the
brochure and bragging rights.  Interested in telling everyone that you
are a professional photographer now?


::laughing as I spin round and round and round...::



Monday, August 15, 2005

Mark was in a Motorcycle accident

I found out yesterday that my brother Mark was in an accident.  He lost control of his Motorcycle on a hill during a turn.  He struck some rocks and a tree.  His bike was totaled.  Mark suffered from short term memory loss at first and has a swollen ankle.  Lots of bruises and cuts...



48 hrs later, and my power is back on!

We had a HUGE storm blow thru on Saturday and it knocked out the power to my neighborhood.  I it back on.  LOL!  Here's hoping my food didn't ruin in the fridge...


Here is a poem I wrote today sitting on my back porch while watching the rain come down...





-tap  -tap  -tap


the rain comes down

like a constant reminder

keeping an irregular beat

on the porch’s tin roof


-tap  -tap  -tap


the chimes hang silent

their voices stilled

by the grey lined day

no breeze to wake them


-tap  -tap  -tap


a flock of geese

graze the meadow beyond

silently browsing past

searching for their next meal


-tap  -tap  -tap


they move left to right

like keys on an old typewriter

occasionally stretching and calling

reminding themselves of who they are


-tap  -tap  -tap


the stale smell of tobacco

lingers near the ashtrays

reminding me of old revelries

when cards were last dealt


-tap  -tap  -tap


men laughing at jokes

humor spreads round the table

like a bottle of wine

passed from friend to friend


-tap  -tap  -tap


the geese pause and turn

and work their way back

like the tide retreating

from a shell tossed beach


-tap  -tap  -tap


an unseen siren cuts the grey

warning of possible danger

as it speeds to it’s destination

an appointment in the rain


-tap  -tap  -tap


scratchs my pen

as I sit here safe

sheltered from the rain

watching it all unfold


-tap  -tap  -tap


the toppled tree balances

across a live power line

like a circus high wire act

that has forgotten it’s finale


-tap  -tap  -tap


in the distance I hear

a small gas generator

coughing and complaining

about it’s dwindling fuel


-tap  -tap  -tap


the cadence of rain

the chimes slumber still

the geese have flown

the smoke still lingers


-tap  -tap  -tap


the circus continues

the storm has passed

the watcher gazes

and the rain comes down