Wednesday, November 9, 2016

The Deplorables control America the Beautiful...

Last night the RACISTS and THE WILLFULLY IGNORANT won.  The Stupid People are in charge...

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Why am I so hard on Republicans?

I'm going to 
snatch the stupid 
right from your mouth 
and use it to beat you 
black and blue...
(Don't like it?  Quit saying Stupid Things)

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

I am a proud LIBERAL in the tradition of our Founding Fathers...

I don't hate Conservatives. Stupid People do get on my nerves, and sadly the Republican Party is bowing down to THE WILLFULLY IGNORANT...

Why are the STUPID PEOPLE in charge of the Republican Party?

Tuesday, September 27, 2016


I am in a pickle, an embarrassment of riches...

(Don't forget I am a professional poet, Mt. Olive once paid me in free pickles)

The girlfriend is a travel agent and has access to discount fares and she has even won free charter plane tickets to Cancun.  To celebrate her 40th Birthday we will be taking an almost free trip to the Yucatan Pennisula in Mexico and staying at two seperate all inclusive resorts.  Ziplines, swimming with dolphins, climbing pyramids, the whole schmear...
A World Heritage Site!

Yesterday they announced that Adam Ant will be touring America immediatily after we return and I want to do the whole VIP Experience and meet my favorite Performer.  I don't think I can swing an international trip and a Chicago Concert that close together.  This sucks...
(I want to meet Adam so bad)

No moral person will cast a vote for Donald Trump...

I erase 1/2 of what I type on Facebook. Not kidding. I worry that I might alienate people that will vote for Trump and I will have to live with them afterwards. Then I think, no I don't. Why would you want to associate with THE WILLFULLY IGNORANT, the RACISTS, the ONE ISSUE VOTERS or the GUN NUTS? Life is too short to give horrible people any room in your life...

Saturday, September 24, 2016


Mom yelling up to me on the third floor, 
"David, Matthew Barnum is here with TWO girls..."

Me yelling down to the first floor,
"Send up the two girls and 
tell Matthew that I will see him at school!"


Wednesday, September 21, 2016

jus a lil' bit...

die antwoord jus a lil' bit...

"Fatty Boom Boom"

Yo hi-tek, u fink u can fuck wif summing like dis?

Yo what u mean summing like dis?

Ja dat's spif
Yo-landi do dat fing!

Hey fatty boom boom! Hit me wif da ching ching!
Fat pocket klinking! Dollar eye twinkling!
Jeez da beats so chunky! Me'sa getting funky!

Wen I'm on da mic it's like murder murder murder! Kill kill kill!
Wat se zuid afrika? Suig my fokken piel
Hie kom ek weer! Like a lekker smack in face
Rappers r fucking boring ninja bashing dere brainz
What happened 2 all da kool rapperz from back in da day?
Nowawayz all deze rapperz sound exactly da same
It's like 1 big inbred fuck-fest sis!
No I do not wanna stop collaborate or listen
Jimmy jimmy jimmy, hold on 2 yor ching
I'm taking over amerika blowing up everyfing
Physically fit da ninja very energetic
If u haven't got it by now yo you never gonna get it
I whip my dick out an piss on all dis horrible fokken rap
Got a off-shore account 4 da dollar bills dat I stack
Yo fuck rap! I'm sorry my china we not related
I cum mad fresh like da 1st time I ejaculated


Hi my name is...
Yo-landi fokken vi$$er! Fight fight fight!
Kick u in da teef! Hit u on da head wif da mic!
Dere's a rumble in da jungle I'm bubbling 2 da beat
I'm not looking 4 trouble but troublez looking 4 me
My pockets r fokken swollen but nuffing jus cum 4 free
I used 2 beg borrow or steal jus 2 hustle sumfing 2 eat
Souf afrika used 2 b 2 dwankie 2 notice me
Suddenly u interested cause we blowing up overseaz
Making money money money! Yes yes yes!
Zefside represent! U fucking wif da best
I'm a upper! Dwankiez get popped like a sucker
Baka baka! Yipee kaiyay muddafucka!
I'm a big deal! Yo krazy money get thrown at me
Now I'm having so much dat I can't even go 2 sleep!
Yo-landi! Wat? Where u at? Here I am!
Spitting fokken lyrix like bam bam bam!


We keep it lekker lekker lekker zef zef zef!
Spend all my fuckin money till dere's nuffing left
I'm a fat cat keep da change I don't need a slip...
For dis fat sack of dagga yo I'm smoking a splif
In my matt black subaru haters throwing a fit
Round da corner gooi n lekker spif tokyo drift
My daddy told me dere'z a lot of fish in da sea
Dere'z also lot of muddafuckn money, bitchez and weed!
Ja dagga! Dagga! Dagga! Puff puff puff!
Bring da beat back hi-tek... make it ruf!
We drop da type of beats dat make u shut da fuck up an dance!
We drop da type of beats dat got u fuckin stuck in a trance
In da overseaz dey like 2 say u stuck in a trance
We drop da type of beats dat make u fuckin cum in yor pants
Uh! Waarsie fokken dagga? Pass it 2 da left
Lekker z 2 da e 2 da muddafuckn f!


Jeeziz ou! Chill net n bietjie fokken uit!

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

DONALD TRUMP IS A RACIST (and so is everyone that votes for him)

Donald Trump's Father was a member of the KKK. Donald Trump's Father was arrested at a KKK Rally. Donald Trump's Father was sued successfully for Discrimination against Minorities in his Rental Business.
Donald Trump is supported by the KKK. Donald Trump uses Racist Rhetoric. Donald Trump was sued successfully for Discrimination against Minorities in his Rental Business.

Donald Trump is a Racist.

You can vote for Trump.
You just can't call yourself a Christian if you do...

Thursday, August 25, 2016


  1. Even though I have a front fender headlight I still wait till dawn to begin my ride!
  2. Playing on my smart phone means my ride begins 15 minutes AFTER dawn...
  3. Question: Have you ever worried that you may get a ticket for riding in a park before it officially opens?
  4. Early morning fog covering Simpson Park guarantees I ride that section first!
  5. Last week's Sewer Treatment Plant Shutdown guarantees Simpson Lake smells like a 72-acre Porta Potty that hasn't been serviced all Summer...
  6. Question: Have you ever smelled something so bad that you could taste it on your teeth?
  7. Dear Spider #1) Thank You for hanging a dead leaf in your invisible web so I know where not to ride my bike!
  8. Dear Spider #2) YOU SUCK...
  9. Question:  Have you ever rode through a spider web so thick that when you cleaned it off of you it pulled up your shirt?
  10. I love riding my bike early mornings along the almost abandoned Greenway!
  11. I avoid eye contact with The Creepy Guys In Their Pick Up Trucks Near the Park's Restrooms...
  12. Question: Have you ever worried you might look like A Creepy Guy Near The Park's Restroom while waiting for dawn?

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Bill O'Asshat

O'Reilly is an opportunistic asshole that preys on the stupidity of THE WILLFULLY IGNORANT, the hatred of RACISTS and the tunnel vision of THE ONE ISSUE VOTERS.  He makes money off of peddling misinformation to the viewers of FAUX News.

Bill O'Reilly is what is wrong with America...


Thursday, July 21, 2016


Even years
after you 
are free 
you continue 
to tear away 
at yourself...

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Let me translate for you...

When someone starts a conversations with "Well now I'm not a Racist...",
it's translation reads "I hate Black People, but I'm just smart enough to know to deny it"

Want to know how to spot a Racist?

Don't worry, they will tell you...


Missouri Republicans

I am so embarrased to watch the Missouri Politicians Attack ads where they vilify applauding our President and brag on their ability to shoot Military Grade Assault Weapons while using "Moderate" like its a cuss word. Monster Trucks and the WWF have shat out a Sinquefield bastard...

Which is worse?  That the Republican Party thinks Missourians are simple
minded Racists or that most Missourians are not insulted by this?

Sunday, July 10, 2016

The Secret to Dancing

#1 I don't care what you think
#2 I am a slave to the rhythm
#3 And I am not afraid...

(in my head I am always dancing)

Monday, July 4, 2016

Tuesday, June 7, 2016


As a lifelong Democrat I cannot help but chuckle watching the implosion of the National Republican Party.  It's like they go, "Hey let's find the stupidest 4 Republicans we can and ask them who they want us to run for President."  You reap what you sow...

When you court Bigots, Racists and the Willfully Ignorant you get Donald Trump as your Presidential Candidate...

Thursday, June 2, 2016

America is not an ugly place

The Racists and Willfully Ignorant will always try and make America an ugly place.  The good news is that there are not enough Racists and Willfully Ignorant people in America to elect Donald Trump as President.  There is a difference between Republicans and Democrats and that is why I am proud to be an American and a Democrat.  Democrats are not perfect and I continue to fight against the ignorance in my own party, PeTA for instance.  Even with the Democratic Crazies the Republicans will still stand out for their ignorance and hatred.  I'd like to say after the election the Racists and Willfully Ignorant will quiet down, but that is not how they operate.  They will always shout their ignorance and hatred until they die, that is who they are at their core; ugly, UGLY people.  And since that is the base support of the Republican Party, there will not be another Republican in a National Office until they excise their reliance on ignorance and hate...


Monday, April 18, 2016






I love them all, and for exactly the same reason...


Sunday, April 17, 2016

I am David

alone inside my head
i speak the same words
and think the same thoughts

alone inside my head
i remember long ago memories
and relive long ago stories

alone inside my head
is as it always has been
and as it always will be

alone inside my head
I am David
and that is ok

Friday, February 26, 2016

The End of the Republican Party...

I honestly believe we are seeing the end of the Republican Party.  They destroyed themselves by courting greed, Racism and ignorance.  Citizen's United allows the Rich to manipulate the voters and custom pick the candidates who will do as they wish.  20% of the supporters of Donald Trump want to own Black People as slaves.    The Willfully Ignorant only care about punishing sinful women and will vote for anyone who support their desire to yell "SLUT" at unmarried women and scream "BASTARD!" into the faces of little children.  The Republican Party no longer controls their candidates...